By the way...

I'm not having sex with Valeria Mezzina. Just wanted to clear that up for you.

Spillage

I am at a loss. I was having a great time until my parents came home. They leak emotion all over the place like a bucket without a bottom. Of course, a lot of it got all down the front of my shirt, and it just won't go away. I tried wiping it off, but that only helped a little. It's not even mine, yet I'm the one who's upset and terrified and tense. I didn't even do anything.

Nevermind. That's not what I came here to talk about. Here's a rough, scratchy attempt:

I want to kiss you. I want to do it slowly and softly. My heart shoots up into my throat every time I try to speak your name. I feel like a jerk because I can't just come out and say what I want to say. I even feel like a jerk for wanting to say the things I want to say. I don't say them. Until now. I want to start kissing you harder, more passionately. I want to hold you close to me, hold you tight against my body. I want to improvise. I want to try new things. I want to find my limits and your limits, and I want to know you like nobody else knows you. I want to whisper in your ear how much I love you. I want you to know I love you, and I want you to feel safe and right around me. I want to be a reliable, desirable person for you. Most of all, I want you.

What do you want?

Demonstration and Further Explication of the Previous Entry

Anybody who's in the business of making money from consumers on a large scale will, no doubt, have an effective advertising campaign in effect. Anybody who studies a lot of ads with the perspective of they're trying to sell you something, don't give in, will notice that these ads will go to any length to grab another group of customers in. Car advertisements now feature cool music, in order to appeal to the hip new adults (read: car buyers) sprouting up everywhere. On the internet, ads detect what's on a page in order to maximize the number of people in the target group who sees the ad, and minimize viewing by the people outside of that group. Fucking excellent.

Corporations, although they all seem evil, generally aren't. Take, for instance, the owner of this website. Not me, you doofus. Google owns blogspot. Google is awesome. Sure, they keep track of every search ever made, every link ever clicked, and generally everything everyone does on the internet, and sure that's creepy, but they're using it for some damn awesome things. But i'm getting of topic. My point is that corporations aren't evil by nature.

That said, they're slowly but surely destroying the genuine soul of everything that ever had one. But it's not the corporations who are to blame. The problem, reader, is you. That's right, it's you, your friends, your family, and everyone you've ever seen. It's even me. We've let the corporations become soul-stealers. We've come under the popular and comfortable assumption that everything a corporation puts forth is automatically uncool, boring, typical, and even nauseating. I, for one, am fucking sick of this immature and destructive attitude. What the fuck is your objective in life? Do you want to do what you want to do, or do you want to become the opposite of something that you merely think (incorrectly, I might add) is destroying the world? I want to do what I want to do, whether or not a corporation says it's cool.

Every time I step foot inside a mall and look around at all the pretty things on display, I shake my head and scowl and do all kinds of stupid things, like an immature little hipster brat. If I'm with people, I feel the urge to loudly point out how blatantly obvious the subliminal advertising is, and how I'm immune to it. I'm getting better all the time, as the Beatles song goes, but I still have the occasional outburst. These days, I'll catch myself in the middle of a sentence and stop myself. Lifestyles take time to overcome.

Why do I bring this up? Maybe you have a similar disease. I used to think it was clairvoyance, but now I think it's a curse. Maybe I'm still wrong. What I do know is that it's fucking obnoxious and I hate myself for doing it. I hope you do too.

I don't think you get the point. Be true to your own beliefs, likes, loves, regardless of who else shares or pretends to share them. You're weak if you can't do this. You're a spineless, worthless piece of shit. You're a leaf of paper. Grow a pair, you pansy whimpsauce-eating vagina. I bet you like reading all these funny words. I bet you just changed your mind! Fuck off. You disgust me.

Something that Needs to be Said

A Very Brief History of the West Since the Middle Ages

1. Religion rules. Life sucks. Nobody's allowed to have sex, or know about sex, or anything, until they're married.
2. Many periods and events, such as the Renaissance, Exploration, the Enlightenment, and several revolutions change the face of things drastically. No longer is monarchy the standard. America becomes the forefront of the spirit of revolution and freedom.
3. Industry pops up, things are mass-produced, and an environment develops where consumerism is able and allowed to thrive.
4. The 50's happen, when a rigid lifestyle of family, suburban house, white picket fence, dog, and social norms is commonplace.
5. The 60's begin, and people get tired of the 50's' rigidity. It lasts for a few years, but by the end of the 60's, people nationwide change drastically, living in communes, listening to rock, getting stoned, etc. Also, the civil rights movement occurs.
   
6. The 70's, 80's, 90's, and 00's, people fight for specific civil liberties. Women's rights, gay rights, sexual rights, abortion, etc, are fought for adamantly. AIDS rises, and kills millions.

The state we're in today is that nobody gives a shit about anything anymore. Every issue that's brought up today is done so by a company, company spokesperson, celebrity, or other figurehead. Everyone who matters realizes or thinks it's a ploy to get money. Furthermore, people realize the mistakes of past people, and even see mistakes they themselves have made. The realization of these mistakes is often life-changing. Zealous public figures are usually revealed as hypocrites, leaving the people with an unprecedented skepticism.

That said, people can't work up the courage to get some conviction. Nobody believes anything these days, because everything they've ever believed in has been shattered. Everyone's jaded by this. Nobody has seen truth, and they're wary of anything proposing to be it.

You and I need to rise against the emptiness, the meaninglessness. Be yourself. Be truthful and true to yourself and others. We need to show this world what truth really is.

Godspeed You! Black President

From all of us inside my head, congratulations. You rule. Literally. And hey! Our next leader won't be doubling as the court jester. I'm just waiting to find out what Sean Hannity's going to say. In my head, there's video of him sitting on his news desk in a diaper, crying because he needs his president changed. Whoops, bad analogy... Anyway, sweet. We have our first non-white president. But I'm sure you knew that.

Telephoning Ostentatious Operators; Forsaking All Reason

WEB LOG. It's what it used to be called. Web log -> weblog -> 'blog. It's all the raaaage, dude. Grooveh. Cool. Sick nasty, bro. Sweet. Sweet like the sugary syrup I poured upon your bosom yesterday eve, as we slipped into a coma of delicious drips. Comatose. Fructose. Fructis. You spend too much money on your hair. I liked it the way it was before. Why did you have to go and change it? Got any spare change? I need to pay the toll man. Toll house cookies. A Nestle brand. A brand. Steward Brand. The sixties. Funny that THE EPOCH is midnight on January 1st 1970, not even accounting for the 60's at all. What about history? What about tradition? Are you going to leave all this behind? Are you even prepared for what repercussions may come of your actions? I'm not. I don't have to be. After all, I'm not even the one writing this.